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I love how self selection works. I read a bunch of websites of people who I more or less agree with, then when Bush comes out in support of the No Gay Marriage amendment it looks like I'm not the only one who's decided to bail out of the Republican party.

Well certainly I'm not the only one, but I get the feeling that internet commentary is younger in general and that accounts for the seemingly high level of support for gay marriage online. I don't think that translates into the attitudes of society at large. But who knows... Maybe I'm wrong.

If I get one of these for work, can I stop going outside in the cold for a smoke?

Somebody is auctioning off a pair of Bonnaroo VIP passes on ebay. They found an image of Trey's show in my Bonnaroo review from a couple of years ago. I'm fine with them using the picture. Hell, I think I stole it from somewhere else myself. But they linked to it directly on my server. Do I:

A: Go to the auction later this evening and politely request that the auctioneer move the picture to his own server.

B: Remove the picture and throw a big red X in his auction.

C: Replace the image with text saying "Don't Steal My Bandwidth".

D: Replace the image with something that will make him regret linking to an image on my server.

The poll is open. If you vote D, leave your suggestions in the comments.

Why yes, this is the best commercial ever produced.

(Link found everywhere)

Harvard apparently recently ran a dialect survey. Kind of like the Pop vs. Soda map, but with many more maps.

OK, I get some of them. How do you pronounce the first vowel in aunt. What do you call the activity of driving around in circles in a car.

But was there really the need to break down this question by state? And why so many responses?

Governor Schwarzenegger is on Meet the Press this morning, and a bit into the interview we had this exchange:

Tim Russert: In your book Education of a Bodybuilder you said something that caught my attention:

"I was always honest about my weak points. ...I think it's the key to successin everything: be honest; know where you're weak; admit it."

After 100 days as governor, what do you think your weakest point is in trying to be governor?

Arnold: Well, first of all I'm very happy you studied so thoroughly my bodybuilding book. I can tell on your body that it is a whole different ballgame, Tim. I mean look at your deltoids and your six pack. It's amazing. So congratulations on that.

Wait a second, did Arnold just call Russert a girly man?

I did the normal Saturday night dart tournament tonight. I finished fourth out of eleven teams, which was in the money, so I got a couple beers paid for.

On the way home, Iko Iko was on the radio. That is not a good song to have stuck in your head when you're trying to get to sleep.

This is the second year in a row I am not in New Orleans for Mardi Gras. Next year will be a better year.

No Mardi Gras, no Bonnaroo. Something has to give.

Since I stopped voting LP, I've generally voted Republican. My take on your reprehensible platforms on social issues has always been that you'll shoot your mouth off to pacify the religious base, but never really do much about it.

If you choose, as it seems you are, to make social issues central in your campaigns this fall, I am gone.

The nation needs to remain focused and "win the war on terror, support our troops, find the terrorists wherever we can and either put them in a cell or put them in the cemetery," DeLay said.

All of that is part of a focus on "security, prosperity and family," he said.

"But security and prosperity are not worth anything if you don't maintain and protect the American family from the onslaught that is attacking the family, starting with gay marriages," he said. "We believe the American family is headed by a man and woman, and that is marriage, and that is the foundation of this country."

No, Tom. I won't be the first to say it, but winning the war on terror will not be worth it if we end up at the end with our very own theocracy here at home.

Cousin Jay is about to have twins, so this weekend's Big Smith show is cancelled.

So what the hell am I supposed to do this Saturday now?

OK, it's about that time again. I'm about to finish up the two books I'm in the middle of, then I'm going to have a clean slate. Has anybody read anything interesting lately that they'd like to recommend?

Of what I've read recently:

Orson Scott Card - Ender's Game: A book with a twist at the end that you will see coming from page 3, but is nevertheless pretty enjoyable.

Orson Scott Card - Speaker For The Dead: The second book (?) in the Ender series, and one that I am truly having to force myself to finish. Someone on the Achewood forum warned me that the series truly goes downhill from here.

David Rakoff - Fraud: Amusing at times, and excellent to read over lunch, but Rakoff is no David Sedaris.

Chuck Palahniuk - Fugitives & Refugees - A Walk In Portland, OR: Shorter than the average Chuck book. Alternates predictably fucked-up stories of Chuck's life in Portland with restaurant and attraction reviews in the city. I'll make a stop in Portland when I make my geek-boy pilgrimage to the locations where Twin Peaks was shot.

Does anyone out there have any recommendations?

A misleading headline on Fark made me think that this bill had actually made it into law. The bill would require all vehicles sold in New Mexico to have ignition interlocks installed, requiring drivers to pass a breathalyzer test before starting their car.

The bill in question (H.B. 204: The Arizona, Texas, Colorado, Oklahoma and Kansas Car Dealership Support Act) has yet to pass in the state senate.

Howard Dean on Wisconsin:

"That, we'll talk about on Wednesday after I've had a little time to consult everybody," Dean said. "But, you know, I plan to win Wisconsin one way or the other."

Is a bloody Howard Dean coup in the works? I hate to say it Howie, but Wisconsin might not be the best place to start the revolution. Wisconsin is a rather heavily armed state, and I'm guessing you don't have a whole lot of support outside of Madison. I'm guessing that just my immediate family up in northern Wisconsin and their deer rifles could fend off your nancy-boy Vermont militia.

Why don't you go invade Maine or something...

What do I get when I stop reading Mike Silverman's site for a while? I miss great stuff like the Homoland Security Advisory System...

2. Guarded Condition (Blue). This condition is declared when there is a general risk of same-sex weddings. In addition to the Protective Measures taken in the previous Threat Condition, Federal departments and agencies should consider the following general measures in addition to the agency-specific Protective Measures that they will develop and implement:

Checking with their Southern Baptist pastors for designated emergency response or prayer locations;

Reviewing and updating emergency response procedures; and

Providing the public with any information that would strengthen its ability to act appropriately, including widespread dissemantion of Jack Chick pamphlets and a ban on sale of dance music and stylish clothing.

One of the local news talk shows had two Kansas state reps who opposed gay marriage and a Missouri state rep who supported it on today at lunchtime. A caller asked the two Kansas state reps if they could explain exactly how the gruesome horror that is gay marriage devalues traditional marriage as all its opponents claim. His response was not convincing, but when your argument more or less boils down to "Gays are icky" you're not going to score a lot of points in a debate, I guess.

I do wish that a Democrat other than Barney Frank would grow a pair and come out on the right side of this issue. I honestly don't know which I dislike more with regards to this; The straightforward bigotry of the Republicans, or the wishy-washy politically driven half-assed opposition to gay marriage of the Democrats.

100 Gimpypoints for the first person to correct the punctuation in the previous paragraph.

Christ. I really didn't want to go this year. I really can't afford it. But Damn, they have outdone themselves this time. The full list can be found here, but I'll list some of the highlights from my point of view:

Willie Nelson
Dave Matthews & Friends
Bob Dylan
Trey Anastasio
The Dead
David Byrne
Primus
Wilco
Ani DiFranco
moe.
Los Lobos
Galactic
Medeski, Martin & Wood
Gillian Welch
The Del McCoury Band
North Mississippi Allstars

And damn! Tickets go on sale next Saturday!

$139 + $12 service charge. OK, who else is going?

Well, back to my favorite topic...

When we left off last fall, the Kansas State Legislature had failed to act on Liquor Law rationalization. Kansas courts had earlier ruled that Kansas liquor laws were not consistent, and therefore local governments could opt out of the state liquor laws and allow sales on Sundays, and perhaps even override the silly rules that allow only Weak-Ass Beer to be sold in grocery and convenience stores. Many cities did lift the ban on Sunday sales, though I none have lifted the requirement for Weak-Ass Beer in non-liquor stores.

My town proposed a lifting of the ban on Sunday sales, but those damn churchgoers down the street from my house circulated a petition at a service and submitted it to city council within the comment period. Since the petition had enough signatures complaining about the action, the city council was forced to either withdraw their lifting of the ban or call a special election and put the lifting of the ban to a vote. Since the special election would have cost about $80,000 to run, they withdrew the lifting of the ban in hopes that the state legislature would take up the issue this session. This cowardice on the part of my city council almost prompted me to run for office myself, but since I'm about to get laid off from my job, I couldn't guarantee that I'd be able to serve out the four year term to which I would surely have been elected.

Well, the state senate istaking up the issue. On Wednesday the Senate began debating a bill that would lift the ban on Sunday sales statewide, but raise taxes on beer, wine and liquor. As the day went on, the bill morphed into one which would not raise taxes, but would reinstate the ban on Sunday sales even in municipalities that had previously lifted their bans.

My rat-fuck bastard state senator Nick Jordan voted for the amendment that would make the Sunday ban effective statewide. I will vote against him in November and encourage everyone else to do so as well.

Well, that's all that happened Wednesday. The bill was scheduled for an up-or-down vote on Thursday. Thursday came and the patriots triumphed. The amended bill was voted down 24-15, but was added to today's calendar for further action. I'll be watching what Sen. Jordan does, for now.

Wow, John Stamos has a new show coming soon.

The Stamos project revolves around a guy on a date, with the show's entire season taking place over the course of the daylong outing.

Wow, like 24, but really, really shitty.

(If I quote something from a blog entry that is itself quoting an article, do I have to use two sets of <blockquote> tags? Somebody get the International Court of Justice on that...)

OK fine, there is no sex scandal and I'm going to have to vote for Bush in the fall...

But is there still hope for Howard Dean? It would appear so, as yesterday he picked up the long sought after TweakXP.com endorsement.

It's about time this campaign got interesting...

I'm starting to think that my @gimpysoft.com email address is not particularly professional looking. Unfortunately, I like to keep my mail on my own server, so I don't particularly want to go with a Hotmail or Yahoo address.

Does anybody have any ideas for professional sounding domain names that might not yet be registered?

A Not Safe For Work Google search? But Rick Santorum is a senator, not... that other thing.

I'm not really planning on going this year, but this Friday will be the initial annoucnement of artists for this year's Bonnaroo.

If they really wow me, I may have to find a way to get out there, but at this point I think I have too much stuff going on this summer to make that a priority.

It had to happen sooner or later. The metaphor that officially ends the Howard Dean presidential campaign.

I usually listen to news in the morning on the way in to work, so normally I'm immune to these sorts of things. Well, the Grammys were last night, the radio show did some stories on the winners, and every story featured that song.

Apparently I am going to have "Hey Ya" stuck in my head all freakin' day. Damn you OutKast, and damn you Satan for offerring him the deal that helped him make that song so damn catchy.

UPDATE 2/9/2004 3:54PM : Yup... All freakin' day.

Well, it's past noon, so I'll annouce the winner of the contest that's had the blogosphere in a buzz for the last two weeks, the Gimpysoft Mission Statement Contest. It's not much of a Mission Statement, but I like it anyway:

Gimpysoft: Bearded Since 1994!

I like it. Congratulations to Gurney_Halleck, winner of some junk. What kind of junk do you want, anyway?

Snow in Kansas City! Gasp!

The up-side is that management is sending us home early. Have a good day at work, everybody!

Remember to vote in the Gimpysoft Mission Statement Contest. Voting closes and the winner will be declared Friday at High Noon Central Standard Time.

So far, Gurney_Halleck is in a tie for first with Gurney_Halleck, with dark horse candidate Mike - Y1068 in third.

Vote early, vote often.

When I was very young, I saw an episode of Fame where a character got a nosebleed, and this tipped all the other characters off to her cocaine problem.

Since then, whenever I get a nosebleed, I assume everybody around me will think I'm all hopped up on the white stuff.

This is a problem, as the dry winter weather has caused me to have about four nosebleeds in the last week and a half. Note to self: Get a humidifier tonight.

Alternate title for this post: "My doctor said I wouldn't get so many nosebleeds if I'd keep my finger out of there."

Ever wanted a portrait painted of you with Fleetwood Mac's Stevie Nicks? Well wait no more, people. If you're not into the whole traditional canvas thing, you can always get it on a tambourine.

(Found as the alt-text of today's Achewood of all places...)

Rock on! Radio Paradise played my request...

OK, well I'm sure that's the best thing that's going to happen to me this week.